i just cut my whole back with knife

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i just had a worst birthday ever. i am intrested in bouldering since 2+ months now and i am training my forearms and grip strengh everyday so me and my ''friends'' went to biggest cimbing wall in whole country ofc they forced me to pay for them i din't want to but my mom would not let me go alone so i had to it was fun but my wallet hurts then we ate some burgers in centre of the capital bcs its closest with climbing walls from where i live. then we went with bus to my hometown and made some ''party'' my mom bought many chips choclate and many other snacks we also ate my birthday cake but these monkeys ate 1/2 and then made some clump from cake and played with it they made fun of me whole time they ragebaited me made fun of my mom that tried to make everything good they acted like monkeys. for the presents i got new cheap but good asf rubics cube bcs my old one is falling apart in my hands and FINALLY after 5 years new phone AND ITS THRASH the camera i slightly better than old one the battery is the same the phone is on constant conflict with me its laging when i have opened 2+ apps or when i turn up volume sound is lagging and many more THIS PHONE IS THRASH. after a night with my ''friends'' ( we planed to do 4 ppl ''party'' but only 2 arrived) next day ( today) they called names and made fun of my mom and partly me i finally brethed off when they got home. when i came home and realised this was worst birtday i ever had it should be happy day when i have fun but it was mid, only mid bcs of climbing wall rest was thrash. i started crying i was crying for 2 hours in the darkness of my room listening to lagging music from my new phone. i was soo mad and even more sad i have taken my survival knife in my hand and started cutting my back now i cooled of lil bit but now my whole back is red covered in wounds its bleeding in few places i don't regret it but i am also not happy i just feel nothing now i'l see if it will heal bcs cuts are not that deep but they are visible also god damit i am soo fucking miserable